Stop Acting the Goat!!!

How do you tell someone they are acting the goat (to borrow a phrase from Captain Haddock)...

People can be so pig-headed goat-headed.  They won't be logical, but at the same time won't make allowances for emotion.  And in the end, no matter how emotional I can get, I eventually hit rock bottom.

You can make me cry and bawl a day or two - but eventually there'll be nothing left.  Eventually all I feel is dead inside.  Nice time to make a move, no? (Very Indian sentence structure... lol... can't help it... must lighten this grim mood.....)

So anyway Professor Goat... as I was saying... do what you want to do....  if you think you'll be happy hiring that two-faced lying %^#@^.. (ahem... am I getting carried away here? Do children read this blog?... Nah... why would any self respecting child read this blog... surely they'll have something better to do....)... anyway, ahem,... where was I?

Oh right.  If you think you'll be happy working with that liar that lied to your face and enacted a multi part script... go right ahead.  Don't you realise he made a fool of all of us?! You included! I'll be right here with a cushion for your ass once you're done kicking yourself.

And if you dare ask me why I didn't say this to you.... I'll tell the truth.  You never believe me unless you want to.  Whenever it suits you, you choose to think I'm misguided, unthinking, or just plain wrong.  Well, it doesn't matter now.  It's your life.  You have to live it.  Considering the person you are, you'll probably fall on your feet like a cat.  Though how any self-respecting cat could work with that two-faced rat!!! is beyond me.  But this judgement will remain on the pages of this blog... cos this isn't the real world.  And here I don't have to censor myself. And here I can be wrong.  And maybe I will be wrong. (Though I don't think so - I personally think that lying SOB is going to chew you up and spit you out....)

Will we survive this?  I don't think so.  If this was a season, it's probably coming to an end.   I can't bear pain and loss.  I'd rather rip the band aid off and count one more friend down.  After all - 10 years isn't that long.

July 2013

Changes again...

Back again from 3 weeks in the UK... in the middle of the biggest project of my life... someone planning to move away... me holding a bag...

Messages from God... but still so scared... ulcers forming???... Oh God help please... Que cera cera... but hurry!!!

Performance Management

February and March have been crazy for the past three years as performance management time roles around again.  This year it's been quieter.  Maybe because a lot of the work was done over the last two years and we can use a lot of what we created previously.

So as March rolls around this year, for the first time I'm not as close to breaking point as I usually am at this time of the year.  Life is good.

:-)

Slamming Doors

I have had a very close friend. He got married.  Now I have one less friend.

It’s insidious - this conspiracy that some married people have against having single friends.  I have no deigns on him.  I am not interested in his marital life.  I wouldn’t interfere, or criticise, or do anything.  All I would have done was discuss politics, organizational behaviour, psychology, science, and other topics of mutual interest.  But apparently, that’s not okay.  So… I have one less friend.

I don’t think this is a dictat from his wife.  Or maybe it is.  But frankly I don’t care who is behind it – he or his wife.  I haven’t confronted him.  I’ve noticed him drawing away and I’m respecting his behaviour by keeping my distance.  I’m just crying inside and grieving for the loss of another friend.

What do you do when people draw away?

What do you do when people draw away?

a) try to understand what went wrong and fix it,
b) cry and get depressed,
c) tell them to go f*$% themselves

I've tried all of the above.  Right now, I think my vote would go to "C".  Okay, so maybe I wouldn't "tell" them, but I would "think" it and silently scream it at them.

Judgments

The original article behind the picture is here.  Chances are you've already seen it since it's gone viral.  I just saw it today but it brought to the forefront of my mind a question that has been disturbing me all month.  How judgmental am I?  Like everyone else I don't like people judging me.  Making a snap opinion based on the way I look, the clothes I wear, etc.  And yet, don't I do the same? Isn't that very normal?  Is a snap judgment bad only when it leads you to treat the person differently?

I don't know. But I hope I figure it out.

Mrs. Donkey

Mrs. D does not deserve to have a nice son in law. She deserves the worst. But poor Alice. Why should she suffer?

Just because that $#@%& is a crazy &!#%$ is no reason for that sweet girl to be doomed to misery.

Just to say hi

Lots of things going on in my head. Comparisons mostly.

Mr. A recently confided something to me. I felt hurt because clearly it was something he'd been thinking about for a while. And since I would confide almost everything to him I thought he would do the same to me.  Confiding after months isn't quite the same.

Then Mr. B confided almost the same thing to me. The difference? A confided in me when he was halfway through his journey. B confided in me when he first thought of the journey.

I couldn't help comparing both of them.

The person I was last year would have left it at that. The person I am now analysed it further. And I realised this was another example of comparing apples to oranges.

B confides in people easily. A does not confide in people. Ergo a level 1 confidence from A should be treasured more than a level 3 confidence from B.

And yet, though my head knows this, my heart still compares.

Promoted again... and again

Got promoted twice since I wrote here last... Didn't get out of my job, instead got really hooked on it.

Hmmm..... what changed? I guess new management at the helm.

Last I wrote we were starting shifts. They continued till September 2009 and during that time my life changed completely.

My best friend... found new friends. I became lonelier than I've ever been - but a few people got me through that phase.

For some time my company managed to avoid the recession but in the second half of 2009 it caught up with us and we had to lay off some people.

After that, life moved slowly onwards till June or July 2010. That's when a new potential client popped up and said they wanted some associates to come to New Jersey for training. Guess that's when my life changed again. I was selected for the training - and got a trip to NJ and NY in Sept 2010 out of it. The client did not sign us up in the end cos of some unrelated factors but I got noticed by the new management and got promoted to Manager of a new division in Feb 2011.

It's been little more than a year since then but I've lived several lifetimes during this period.

It's been a rocky year but here I am promoted again - this time to Sr. Manager.

How things have changed - now I desperately want to be instrumental in making my company a success - my writing has receded into the back ground.

But who knows - maybe it's time for a change once again. I've noticed that whenever things seem to have settled - the cards get shuffled again...

Shuffle...